How Can Burdens Be Made Light?

Years ago, I sat across from a therapist. My entire being had become consumed by the violent virus of grief and loss. The dark tendrils of sadness, fear, anxiety, and utter depletion, had woven their way into every inch of my body, mind, and spirit.

I was empty.

I felt like I was drowning at the bottom of the deep end of a pool, with no lifeguard to save me. All of the burdens that I had been carrying had become too heavy for me to shoulder, as I started to fully feel the effects, and trauma, that come after losing a beloved spouse.

I was scared. I was alone.

Everything felt heavy.

Life felt so confusing and dark.

I was clinging to Jesus with every ounce of my depleted energy.

It was in this broken state that I asked my therapist a question. I asked with a sincere desire for an answer: "How can I allow Jesus to make my burdens light?" 

I desperately wanted to just give everything to my Savior, so I could be free. I kept trying to give it to Him, to allow Jesus to take it all away from me -- all the grief and sadness -- but nothing was changing.

My therapist responded to my inquiry with something unhelpful like, "Now that is the real question, isn't it?" 

I sat there even more frustrated than before. But I was still determined to find a way to be set free and have my burdens made light, like the scriptures promised.

I continued to hold on and do the things that would bring greater light into my life like prayer, scripture study, temple attendance, etc. I stayed very close to my Savior, and I slowed everything else in life down that I could. As I patiently waited on the Lord, the light gradually started to return into my life. Or at least, the dark and the light were more balanced. Grief and joy learned how to get along in my heart.

As the years have past, I have continuously pondered the same question about lightening burdens, that I asked in my desperation.

One day, I read this passage In The Book of Mormon:

"And now it came to pass that the burdens which were laid upon Alma and his brethern were made light; yea, the Lord did strengthen them that they could bear up their burdens with ease, and they did submit cheerfully and with patience to all the will of the Lord." (Mosiah 24:15)

As I read that scripture with a desire to learn and understand, I became very interested in the phrase "made light." My mind solidly fixed on the concept of what it means to have burdens "made light." So, I began to study a little.

The definition of "light" is: The natural agent that stimulates sight and makes things visible; to provide illumination; spiritual illumination; something that enlightens or informs; truth.

With this new definition in mind, I considered the scripture -- and how it applied to me -- with a different perspective.

What if, for me, having my burdens "made light" does not mean that they will be lifted from me, or taken from me; but rather, what if my burdens are there to enlighten me, what if they are there to help me to see the ways of truth? What if my burdens are there to help me understand the gospel, and my Savior, more clearly?

What if my burdens really are a blessing, like stepping-stones across an ocean, helping me to reach the Lighthouse of my Savior, on the other side?

As I have continued to face difficult trials, I often reflect on the lessons that I learned from the intense burden of grief, and the "dark times" of sadness and sorrow that occurred, after Charles died. During those times, I had to slow down life, and I turned my attention to learning, developing, and strengthening my spirit. I was able to learn how to have greater empathy, and less judgement for others, who also experience painful trials. (Which means everyone!)

I learned lessons I simply never would have learned, without being forced into that state of sorrow and pain. I gained very valuable lessons that have been pivotal and crucial to me, and my ability to handle even more challenges and burdens that continuously come.

My burdens were not taken away from me; but they have been turned into light, strength, and knowledge, to make current and future burdens more bearable, as I continually rely on Jesus.

Another lesson I am still working on is the "submitting cheerfully" part of the scripture. Sometimes I can get very frustrated when things don't go as I would hope, and that can happen quite often. But I am learning to let go of the fact that I really have no control over anything in life -- only God has control -- and I need to let Him lead me with patience, rather than me trying to micro-manage everything quickly while wanting fast, clean, and happy results.

Life is meant to be a struggle, so we can learn, and grow, and become like Jesus.

The trials and burdens that I have experienced in this life are there to illuminate my path back to my Savior, not keep me from Him. It is often during the dark times, when we reach even harder for His Light. It is in the dark, that we come to know the value of the Light.

As I look to Jesus in all things, I can submit to Him cheerfully. This does not mean I am always feeling happy all of the time, it just means that I am always cheerful about Jesus all of the time, no matter what is happening to me.

Submitting cheerfully, and with patience to the will of the Lord means that I can feel darkness, and be made light; at the same time.

I am so grateful that my burdens have been made into light. I do not see things perfectly; but because of what I have experienced, I do see things differently than before, and I would not change that.

No matter what happens to me in this life, I am so cheerful about Jesus, always!

He is the Light!