DISCLAIMER

This blog is where I record a limited depiction of my feelings, family, and faith. My blog was recently under intense scrutiny, and so I feel this disclaimer is necessary. I try to tell my story as openly as I can, but this blog represents a cropped and narrow-viewed version of my story -- like all social media -- it is NOT the full story. Many events happen behind the scenes that are not recorded or written about, due to the sensitive nature of others involved. Life has many layers. Many layers can be shared and many cannot, and this blog is simply a layer of my life that I allow others to view, but it is not an accurate depiction of all the layers of my life.

Hello, it's me

I have not felt like writing lately. I don't really know why, but I do know that I have had a desire to live more in the moment. Writing takes effort, sometimes it takes a great effort to produce words that make any sense. My head has felt very muddled lately. Perhaps it is the unhealthy amount of pumpkin products I have been consuming; my brain has felt like the inner guts of a freshly carved Jack-O-Latern. 

Anyway, I never know how to begin again after a long break from the blog. So much has happened, and I have missed recording some very meaningful thoughts and events. This blog is important to me, and has been a method of helping me work through many thoughts and feelings that are kept silent in the deep caverns of my heart. When I do not write, those feelings start piling up; I can become smothered by my own unexpressed thoughts and experiences. 

I am a deep-thinker. When my deep thoughts are not put out to sea, they begin to sink my ship. 

One of the things I miss the most is being able to express my deepest feelings and desires with my Charles. I could say absolutely anything and he would listen and provide feedback. It was emotionally freeing and stimulating to have open discussions with him. Now, at the end of the day, all of my thoughts are left in my mind, without a way out... unless I write. Writing is in no way comparable to the sweetness of captivating discussions with Charles; but it is all I have right now. 

Writing is the wind in my sails.  

So, where to begin? 

Politics... eek! 

Dating... double eek!  

Watcher in the Woods... triple eek!  

Getting a Puppy... joy. 

Returning the Puppy... sadness. 

My First Legit Panic Attack... quadruple eek! 

Speaking in Stake Conference... infinity eek!  

Pumpkin Recipes Guaranteed to make you Gain 10 pounds... no joke.  

My Invisalign Process... pregnancy made my teeth crooked, plastic made them straight.  

Weary of Tears... oh tears, how I am done with you! 

  
I better get writing! I have thoughts that need a place to go outside of my own head. :) 

Comments

  1. Uncle LindyOctober 11, 2016 at 10:21 AM

    Your writing has achieved a whole new level of poetry. Well done!😀😀. - Dad

    ReplyDelete
  2. Amy RhoadesOctober 12, 2016 at 4:23 AM

    I concur with your dad, these one-word answers say everything and come together nicely. I am grateful for your blog and your inspiring thoughts.

    ReplyDelete

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