The Missionaries in the Mental Health Waiting Room

I walked into the therapist's office and immediately noticed two white shirts. I could only see their backs, but I knew instantly that they were missionaries from The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.

It was just a normal day there for me, working through some PTSD and anxiety, which took me by surprise, after the death of my husband. The sight of the two young men caught me off guard, and my heart ached for them as I wondered what they were dealing with, and why they were there. I came to find out it was, "Missionary Thursday," the day my counseling office treats missionaries for free.

I could not help but ask why the missionaries were there. (My counselor is LDS.) Speaking in general terms, and not about specific missionaries, I was told that the young missionaries who come in often suffer from anxiety and panic attacks. It is becoming more and more common. There are many theories around this new epidemic; one theory being that our young people are not being taught how to properly work hard, and be away from home. I was told that the youth -- especially those from America -- really struggle being away from the extreme comfort of their homes and family. They go out into the world after living an overly-sheltered life, completely unprepared for what they will face, and it is overwhelming and shocking.

This is, of course, a generalized statement -- the reasons missionaries seek help are as personal and individual as each missionary -- and they are treated as such. But the anxiety-epidemic is widespread, and taking its toll on the mental health of our youth at an alarming rate. And it is not just those that choose to go on missions. It is all around. We are living in a panicky, anxious, society.

I am absolutely not belittling the intensity of personal troubles that the missionaries deal with; physical illness, mental illness, or both. I have never served a mission, and so I have no room to talk about the challenges of missionary work. I admire all who are willing to be so brave and serve a mission for any amount of time. I cannot personally imagine how hard it must be. It takes great courage to embark on such an extraordinary and perilous journey into the unknown, to serve the Lord. I stand in awe and total respect and admiration of all who have worthily worn the missionary tag. (And the "volunteer tag" in areas where missionaries are not allowed.)

I do not understand the mission intensity from personal experiences; but I have been humbled to the point of great compassion and understanding for those who suffer with mental illness, and other emotional troubles. I am so grateful there is help available, especially for our hardworking, dedicated, self-sacrificing missionaries. It takes courage to seek out and get the help that is needed. Getting help is far better than going it alone. I applaud the missionaries who seek help, for any reason. The troubles that missionaries face are as varied as their individual life experiences, and some trials resurface while out on the mission, forcing hard decisions to be made.

Even the most prepared missionary can be inflicted with illness -- physical or mental -- and so it is never for us to judge, only to love and support.

But this insight into missionary anxiety makes me wonder what might help our young people prepare for the fierce challenge of missionary work? What can be done to help our young women and men prepare for the call to serve? How can we, as parents and leaders, help our children prepare to face the world with faith and not fear?

I asked my therapist these questions, since we were already on the topic. He told me that my children actually have an advantage, because they know that life isn't fair and that life is hard. They have seen loss, pain, sorrow, grief, and the real nitty-gritty stuff that serves as a violent and brutal real-life education. I did not ask for this kind of special preparation, but if it helps them, so be it. (It will, of course, be each individual child's decision to serve. I will do my part to prepare them, as best I can -- ultimately it is up to them.)

Aside from having some traumatic life event, there are other ways to prepare. Along with teaching and living the gospel, there is benefit in exposing children to hard things: different kinds of people, uncomfortable situations, challenging physical experiences, strange food, serving others in unusual ways, different languages, earning/saving money, taking them out of their comfort zones, working really hard, sleeping on dirt, etc.

It is not just great mission preparation -- it is great life preparation.

I think there is value in real-world exposure for children. It is not a guarantee that it will help prevent anxiety, or other unforeseen illness; but the more exposure there is to different things, the less intimidating those things become. Anxiety/depression (and most illnesses) are no respecter of persons, and can strike at anytime; but there is value in childhood preparation for a mission, and simply for life.

Another great life lesson to teach children is to ask for help if they need it. There are doctors, counselors, and other professionals there to help for a reason; because, yes, life can be hard. And there are times when we all need help. (If you don't need help now, you will.) God has provided this help for us in the form of trained professionals, family, friends, leaders, etc. Getting the help needed shows strength, not weakness.

I wanted to stand up and clap for the missionaries who were there getting help in the therapist's office.  The courage to get help was not the only reason I wanted to stand and applaud them. These missionaries were doing something phenomenal.

I could not help but fix my eyes on them, it was as if they glowed with goodness. I am sure that one or the other (or both) of the companions were suffering with something, otherwise, they would not have been there. But despite that, my heart completely burst at what they were doing, while they were waiting.

There was a lady sitting next to them, who was also there for some sort of healing from her troubles. She held a little dog on her lap for comfort. The missionaries wasted no time to start chatting with her. They pet her dog, and talked to her with warmth and kindness. The lady seemed happy to talk to them, and she joyfully gushed over her dog, that she loved so much. One of the missionaries was letting the little dog lick his face. (Remind me to add dog-licking exposure to the list for mission preparation.)

The missionaries were there serving the Lord -- reaching out -- in the very moment when they were seeking help for their own troubles. They were displaying the very essence of the gospel of Jesus Christ. They were lifting the hands that hung down, with their own hanging-down hands.

And that is what being a missionary is all about.

God bless our missionaries.