DISCLAIMER

This blog is where I record a limited depiction of my feelings, family, and faith. My blog was recently under intense scrutiny, and so I feel this disclaimer is necessary. I try to tell my story as openly as I can, but this blog represents a cropped and narrow-viewed version of my story -- like all social media -- it is NOT the full story. Many events happen behind the scenes that are not recorded or written about, due to the sensitive nature of others involved. Life has many layers. Many layers can be shared and many cannot, and this blog is simply a layer of my life that I allow others to view, but it is not an accurate depiction of all the layers of my life.

A Visit to Idaho City

We went for a little drive up to Idaho City. It was a beautiful day, and it had been a long time since we visited the cemetery. It is closed during the winter, so we just don't get there much, which is actually fine with me, and the kids. 

It is a beautiful place to visit, but we prefer to just celebrate him living, rather than grieving at his place of burial. We actually feel the closest to him in our home. Though the cemetery is peaceful and pleasant; he is not there. His body has not yet risen, but his spirit has, and he has work to do. When he has a moment, he pops back home for a visit. I did not feel close to him at all there, while looking at the dirt that covers his mortal husk. 

We walked around a bit, but did not stay too long, since it was a school night. We also stopped at the school park to let the kids play. My parents are here visiting from Alaska, so we all got to enjoy the journey together. It was nice just to get out for a ride. It has been awhile since we have done any traveling. I was able to keep some ice packs on my legs while riding in the backseat, so that was nice. Sometimes it is just so nice to ride. I am the only driver in our family now, so riding is a pleasure I do not often get to enjoy. 

When we got to the cemetery, we found that someone had left a snickers bar on Charles' headstone. I don't know if it was randomly placed, or meaningfully left there by someone? It made the kids smile though, we just left it there... we will see if the animals ever come for it.

There was a moment when the sun was shining right on the headstone. It was really beautiful. I really do love it there. Just to be there is a blessing, and a miracle the way that the location came about in the first place. I have seen more than my fair share of miracles, that is for sure. 

I desperately miss Charles, but I know that he still lives. He is as alive as I am. He is just through another door; one that I cannot open quite yet. I will see him again, and we will be together always. Death is not the end. It is just another beginning... 

"End? No, the journey doesn't end here. Death is just another path, one that we all must take. The grey rain curtain of this world rolls back, and all turns to silver glass, and then you see it... white shores, and beyond, a far green country under a swift sunrise." - Gandalf. 

The journey doesn't end here. Actually, the journey never ends. It continues on forever, and ever. I suppose we might as well enjoy it, right? 

Courage to continue, my friends. 


Here are some pictures from our little trip... it was a beautiful evening. 


























Comments

  1. Glad you got to go, it's so beautiful up there. your kids are growing up so fast i can hardly believe it! :)

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  2. Really nice post Mari. I know I say that a lot. But I mean it 😀

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  3. In a few months I will be traveling to the town where I grew up and where my mother is buried. She died when I was 12 years old. My family moved from the town while I was in college and I have never had the opportunity to go back until this summer. I live on the other side of the country from my former home town. Visiting the grave which I have not been to in over 35 years will be one of the first things I want to do, but as I have been thinking about it I think that I will be a little disappointed because like you I don't expect to feel her there. Thank you for your post. I will not feel disappointed if I don't feel anything special there, but I will go to honor her.

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