The Scarcity Mentality

"Most people are deeply scripted in what I call the Scarcity Mentality. They see life as having only so much, as though there were only one pie out there. And if someone were to get a big piece of the pie, it would mean less for everybody else. 

The Scarcity Mentality is the zero-sum paradigm of life. People with a Scarcity Mentality have a very difficult time sharing recognition and credit, power or profit -- even with those who help in the production. They also have a very hard time being genuinely happy for the success of other people. 

The Abundance Mentality, on the other hand, flow out of a deep inner sense of personal worth and security. It is the paradigm that there is plenty out there and enough to spare for everybody. It results in sharing of prestige, of recognition, of profits, of decision making. It opens possibilities, options, alternatives, and creativity. 

-Stephen Covey

I have had the concept of "Scarcity Mentality" brought to my attention a number of times over the last few weeks. I have recently had in-depth conversations with my teenage daughter about this topic. I have discussed it with a good friend, who had some comparison concerns. And it came to my attention very profoundly, as I listened to the beautiful Young Women share their feelings during their Young Women in Excellence night -- with so many of them comparing their talents to others.  In all my observations, they were worried about not "measuring-up" or being as good as someone else. 

I have thought about this topic a lot, actually, as it has plagued my own mind from time-to-time. But I have decided that when it comes to comparing ourselves to others it goes something like this:  

Comparison = Falling Short = Discouragement = Failure. 

We all have gifts that we have been given -- some have more, some have less. But if I recall correctly, it is HOW we use our talents and gifts that is important -- not HOW MANY talents and gifts we have. 

I believe that the "Comparison Game" is one of the great tools that the Adversary uses to keep good people down. It also keeps people from sharing, or pursuing their talents. It can be even harder now, with constant access and connection to the successes of others -- the game of comparing has been taken to the next level. 

Consider the thoughts of Mr. Covey . . . Can you be happy for the successes of others? Or does the success of others make you burn with envy? Do you have a "deep inner sense of personal worth and security"? Or do you secretly wish people would trip and fall flat on their face? 

I will be honest and admit that I have struggled with this over time -- depending on where I am at spiritually. I also believe it is one of the great battles of being Mortal. We all want to be special. We all want to believe that God thinks we are special. I mean, like, we want to be really special. Maybe even more special then everyone else? 

And I think THAT is the key. . . we ARE special! Each and everyone of us! You know that deeply embedded desire to be something amazing and wonderful? Well, it is because you ARE something wonderful!

If we could view ourselves the way that God does, then we would never doubt ourselves again! If we only knew who we really are. If we only knew what we are capable of. If we could view our fellowmen in the same light -- what a wonderful world this would be! 

I do believe we CAN get to a place in our lives where we find joy in the fact that someone else wins the "lottery". We CAN be truly happy when someone else succeeds at the thing you wanted to claim as your own success. 

But how? How do you reach this "higher plain"? 

Maybe if we could realize that there is "plenty out there and enough to spare for everybody." Then maybe, just maybe, we could find our own niche, our own way for success, and we can do it our own way -- without comparing it to the ways of others. 

I do not know how many times I have heard that success flows through positive energy. I am not talking about worldly wealth, or things like that -- that is not true success. True success is being at a place in your life where you feel peace and joy. Happiness. Oh, beautiful happiness! 

So, you can continue to knock yourself, and others, down -- like a row of colliding dominos. Or you can rise-up, stop comparing, stand tall, and help lift others to a higher plain . . . a happier plain.  The plain of the "Abundance Mentality." 

There IS enough "Life-Pie" for everyone! 

As one of my favorite shirts says: "Happiness wishes everybody happy." And that is the truth! 

What do you think...? 

Can YOU wish everyone happy? Can you wish yourself happy by stopping the comparison-game? Or are you going to keep knocking you down?