85 Recipients
Apparently, it is a super time sensitive event to retrieve usable tissue and organs. Without time to think, I was signing paperwork to have his body parts removed from his mortal husk. At the same time my mind was reeling with emotion and disbelief. I kept thinking, "Wait! Are we sure he is really dead, before we start ripping him apart?" Everyone around me was treating this like medical routine, while my whole world was being ripped to pieces -- including Charles' beautiful body. I could not believe it, any of it. It felt like a nightmare.
During the worst night of my life, I got a phone call at around 4am to discuss tissue donation. I had to control my weeping and wailing, to answer a phone questionnaire about all of Charles' medical history. I was shaking the whole time. I was holding back the desire to burst into pieces. I calmly answered the questions, and let them know they could have it all... anything they could use, I wanted them to use it. After I hung up, I threw the phone on the floor. I was so frustrated that this was my life.
On March 31, I was hugging Charles' beautiful body. On April 1, I was offering it up as a life saving donation.
This was not part of my life plan.
Just yesterday, I received a letter in the mail letting me know how his donation has helped save others. I was shocked when I saw the number: 85. His death has helped 85 people live a better life. My heart was conflicted with the news, because to me he is everything, but I am grateful his death could be an instrument in helping so many. It makes him happy, I am sure. He has not ceased to serve the living, even in death.
This kind of news is always so bittersweet for me. It makes his death so physical, and tangible all over again. I prefer not to think of his physical body much now, and I try and focus on his living spirit. These kind of reminders are hard.
However, the children saw the letter, and it made them really excited. They were so happy he could help so many people. They knew he had donated his organs and tissues, but they were surprised at the number of people he was able to help.
I wonder if those 85 people know that they are walking around with a piece of one of the finest men to ever walk the earth? I wonder if they feel grateful for the gift that was given? I guess I will never really know. But I do know Charles is grateful he could offer one final physical act of service with his body. He always loves to help others.
Charles, you are a superhero. Just look at you saving lives! You are amazing. I love you.
No words can express these kinds of feelings but you somehow expressed yours. I pray for your strength. You are also a Super hero Mari. I don't know if I could have shared like you did.
ReplyDeleteThat is amazing Mari. Do you think you'll find out more? Or just leave it?
ReplyDeleteThat is awesome that so many people were helped. I had no idea. You are awesome
ReplyDeleteDear Mari, I'm not sure of the appropriate words to write. You have such a beautiful way of expressing tender feelings. Thank you for your strength, your honesty and your testimony. I look forward to reading what you have to share. I've learned so much from you. As the anniversary approaches you and your children are in my prayers.
ReplyDeleteI agree with Kris, you are a superhero. :) Your choice at the hardest time in your life has positively affected so many people...incredible!
ReplyDeleteoh Mari, you've got me wiping tears again. That had to be a bittersweet letter as you described. I'm glad your kids were there to be happy that their Daddy could help others. I cannot imagine having to make that decision that you made that night almost a year ago. Those that have received organs or tissue must be forever grateful for the gift you and Charles offered them (without even knowing who they are.) That's amazing to me! you are amazing!
ReplyDeletehugs,
Kary
Thank you for sharing this Mari. You are a source of strength, always.
ReplyDeletequite remarkable....85 is a lot of people. bitter sweet for sure.
ReplyDelete