Choosing Happiness: 40% in Your Control

I have been making a study of happiness lately. They say you are what you read, so why not read all about happiness? We have such an abundance of information at our fingertips at all times, and there are so many positive resources to tap into to enlighten our minds, and fill our lives with goodness. I try to seek out that goodness on a daily basis.

A few days ago, I watched a show called, "Happy." It was a documentary about humanities search for happiness. One of the quotes I enjoyed from the show was:

"The U.S. Constitution doesn't guarantee happiness, only the pursuit of it. You have to catch up with it yourself." - Benjamin Franklin.

The point is, in order to feel happy, we have to do what it takes. The word "pursuit" means: the action of following or pursuing someone or something. We have to chase after happiness, by making good choices. The ability to choose is a divine gift from God; He wants us to pursue joy. No matter how challenging -- or even depressing -- our circumstances may be, we have the power to choose how we will respond. We can choose to pursue joy, or wallow in defeat without even trying. We need to try! 

Being happy takes effort, sometimes a lot of effort. There is no "quick fix" or magic pill for true and lasting joy. Everyday we wake-up, we face another day, and we get to decide how we will spend our time. Even if we are confined to a hospital bed, there are choices to be made that will increase, or decrease, our sense of peace and well-being. So much of joy is about attitude, along with action.

One of the things that stood out to me from this movie called "Happy," was the chart they used to explain the factors of happiness. They said that the feeling of happiness is 50% genetics, 10% circumstances, and 40% the stuff we can control. For some reason seeing a chart made it really interesting to me. Of course psychologists and scientists are always changing opinions, and making new discoveries, so perhaps the percentages will be found to change over time; but for now, let's go with it.

Basically, what the chart is saying is we have a level of joy passed down to us from our ancestry and genetic makeup; clearly this is a huge percentage that affects the way that we feel, and how our brain works. It is kind of a frustrating percentage if you ask me. But what is more interesting, however, is how small the life circumstances factor has on the brain; apparently circumstances only affect 10% of our happiness levels if we say: lose a loved one, lose a job, win the lottery, suffer abuse, get burned in a plane crash, live in poverty, live in wealth, win the big sports game, become President of the United States, etc., etc. 

They traveled the world and found that some of the most poverty-stricken communities were just as -- if not more happy -- then those who have wealth and prosperity. Life's circumstances are not the defining factor of experiencing joy. They make up a very small percentage, actually. People tend to blame their circumstances or life experiences when it comes to not feeling joy, but we are far more powerful creatures than that. 

We have the power to choose. We have the power to change our own minds. 

What I want to focus on is that 40%; the part we apparently have control over. We have the ability -- no matter our genetics, or our circumstance -- to drastically improve and change our minds in a positive way. In other words, we can "choose" to pursue happiness, despite chaotic life events, genetics, and all other disappointments. That 40% is perhaps the most important factor in whether or not we can experience true happiness. We have a large percentage of our brain to fight back at life with! I say we take that 40% and run with it! Run towards joy! Having that 40% ability to choose happiness can make your brain an almost half-full cup. That's not too bad! Maybe, if possible, we could fight to change current life circumstances to add another 10%, and there you go; the cup is half full. 

I know from personal experience that happiness is a pursuit. It is not just simply and naturally inside the brain, without effort. Just like we have to choose to exercise faith, hope, or charity; we have to choose to exercise joy. To exercise our mind requires work and diligence. It is certainly worth the pursuit and the effort. The opposite of pursuing joy is pursuing sadness; No. Thank. You.

I knew early on, after Charles died, that I had a decision to make. I had no time to prepare for his sudden death, I did not know it was coming. But not too long after his passing, I found myself determined to still enjoy life. I did not quit doing the good stuff. I kept to my routine, and the foundation of faith-building habits I had formed. I made an even greater effort to give myself in service to others, despite my own need. I took to pounding my emotions out on the pavement, and releasing with running. I infused my life with the light of the gospel. I was surrounded by angels on both sides of the veil to lift me up. Despite my intense and sometimes unbearable sorrow, I found I was still happy. It actually shocked me. 

How could it be? 

I do not know if I am predisposed to happiness, or not, through my genetics. I know I have sturdy pioneer blood flowing through my veins, and I did feel their help as I carried my own handcart of grief and sorrow. (Where does angelic help fit in on the Scientific Factors Chart, I wonder?) Maybe that 50% genetics is working in my favor, I have no idea. But what I do know is my 10% circumstances factor was certainly not what I wanted it to be, it was the opposite of what I wanted. I found, however, that the 40% control that I had (I did not know the percentage then) -- that 40% control, and what I chose to do with it, made all the difference in the world during one of the most challenging times in my life.

I have discovered that happiness is not the pursuit of pleasure, but rather the pursuit of peace. For me happiness is peace. Fun is fun while it lasts, but peace -- the peace that comes from following the Savior -- is where true and deep contentment is found. So many people nowadays are really missing the mark and seeking after selfish desires thinking it will cause joy. It never will. True joy is in living the gospel of Jesus Christ. True joy is in being selfless, not selfish. 

There was an article in the Church News about the science of supremely happy people. The show I watched on the pursuit of happiness closely mirrored the article, including the happiness factors chart percentages. The show (not a church production) emphasized the importance of charity and service to others as being key to feeling joy. When you lose your life, you save it. They showed a Monk having a brain scan. They had him think normal thoughts, and then they had him go into his meditative "love for others, charity, service" kind of mediation, and his brain lit up like the 4th of July. As he was merely lying down, pondering how much he loved his fellowman, his brain became full of joy. How cool is that?

Service and loving others makes people happy! Just thinking about serving and loving others makes your brain excited! 

Certainly there are some things we might not have as much control over: like our genetic predisposition, or our unchosen life circumstances. But there are so many things that we do have control over, and we always have the ability to choose how we will respond to what is in front of us. I have had many days when I have chosen to cry in my bed, rather then get up and be productive -- those were not very good days. But most days I choose to get my body up from the covers, and rise to face the day to pursue joy and gladness. Joy is not naturally bursting in my heart and head, I have to get up and find ways to invite it in. Like most people, some days are more joyful than others, some days are truly just lame, and that is OK. I do my best, and that is what is expected. I do make a purposeful effort to pursue joy and peace. This does not mean I smile 100% of the time, it means I try. 

Happiness is a journey not a destination. 

Perhaps you are suffering from disappointing circumstances, or battling with frustrating genetics. My advice to you is: do not give up! There are so many things we can do to make life a little sweeter, no matter the trials we face. I have a sign in my bedroom that says, "Do one thing everyday that makes you happy." If one thing is all you can do, then that is good enough. If you do one happy thing a day... that is 7 happy things a week... and 365 happy things a year! Doing the small and simple happy things can add up to having a happy life. I am pretty sure that is something everyone wants. 

And, if you miss out on doing your happy thing today, then simply say: 

I will get up and try again tomorrow.

Take that 40% control over your mind, battle it out with your genetics and life circumstances, and choose happiness! 

To read "The Surprising Science of Supremely Happy People," Go: HERE

Ten Things that Supremely Happy People Do: 

1. Happy people surround themselves with other happy people. Joy is contagious. People are four times more likely to be happy in the future with happy people around them.

My thoughts: People need people. I try hard to surround myself with happy people. I am grateful for my family and friends and their positive influence in my life. I am not an overly social being, but I love to spend quality time with the people I love. 

2. Happy people try to be happy. When happy people don’t feel happy, they cultivate a happy thought and smile about it.

My Thoughts: I know that pursuing happiness is a daily effort. Today's good does not count for tomorrow. Each day is a new day in which happiness needs to be cultivated. Everyday I wakeup and give it my best go. Sometimes I win, sometimes I lose. The point is; I tried. 

3. Happy people spend money more on others than they spend on themselves. Givers experience what scientists call the “helper’s high.”

My Thoughts: My dad is the best example of this. He is always the generous giver. My dad is happy. Go figure. I know paying tithing and fast offerings always helps me to feel a sense of joy. 

4. Happy people have deep in-person conversations. Sitting down to talk about what makes a person tick is a good practice for feeling good about life.

My Thoughts: If you are with me, you are likely having a deep conversation. I want to know why you are who you are. It is important to me. 

5. Happy people use laughter as a medicine. A good old-fashioned chuckle releases lots of good neurotransmitters. A study showed that children on average laugh 300 times a day versus adults who laugh 15 times a day.

My Thoughts: I love to laugh. That is why we watch Studio C.

6. Happy people use the power of music. Researchers found that music can match the anxiety-reducing effects of massage therapy.

My Thoughts: I believe in taking in my daily dose of music. I listen to music often throughout the day. The more beautiful and pure the music, the better I feel! If I listen to too many sappy, depressing, love songs, it can have the opposite effect. I have to choose wisely. 

7. Happy people exercise and eat a healthful diet. Eating a poor diet can contribute to depression.

My Thoughts: YES! I think exercise and food are key to my personal feelings of joy. I love my cookies and sweets, but I also know they can do horrible things to your brain, including making you feel depressed, sad, and sluggish. If you feel really bad/fuzzy in your head, maybe try cutting out sugar to see if it is the culprit. Exercise is a necessity for my joy. I thrive on the endorphins and strength. It is easier to serve others when you feel good yourself. 

8. Happy people take the time to unplug and go outside. Uninterrupted screen time brings on depression and anxiety.

My Thoughts: This is why I run, so I can go outside and experience the real world. Being in nature is the best way for me to connect with God, and clear my head. 

9. Happy people get enough sleep. When people run low on sleep, they are prone to feel a lack of clarity, bad moods, and poor judgment.

My Thoughts: I am still working on this one... I do believe in power naps though. 

10. Happy people are spiritual.

My Thoughts: My belief in God is everything to me. I would simply have no joy without the gospel of Jesus Christ in my life. Jesus is the source of all light and happiness. My pursuit of joy is in pursuing Jesus. 

Have you ever conquered/endured a trial with positive thinking, and taking positive actions? I want to hear about it... 

P.S. The picture above is of my sister, Kary. I took it while we were hiking in Alaska. I told her to look like she was free.